Monday, August 8, 2011

Boo-Hoo Blog

So this is the biggest event of my day:


I know, I know, every parent says it; "I can't believe my baby is going to Kindergarten!" I thought I was prepared for these emotions. After all, this is not my first "First Day of School" to go through! Let me back up a bit...

Samuel starting preschool two weeks before turning 3.
Baby Olivia not sure what to think.

Samuel starting year two of preschool, two weeks before turning 4.
Olivia is pretty excited for him!

First day of Kindergarden, two weeks before turning 5.
Olivia is excited again but Baby Emma not sure what to think...

But today we took my firstborn baby to a new school. A very very big new school. With lots of kids and buildings and new newness. My son looks very big and tall thanks to genetics, and he fit in thanks to the mandatory school t-shirt, and he acted very confident. But I wish I knew what was really going on in his little brain...

Since he missed the 'real' first day last week due to the stomach flu, he's starting today without being aware of some of the basic rules he's supposed to follow. Like sitting down outside the classroom, waiting for the teacher to open the door, in nicely formed boys lines/girls lines. But another (loudmouth) parent instructed him to sit and so he did.


He knew where his seat was and after making a few cautious glances my way, he just sat quietly and waited for instructions. I kissed him and walked away. I left that little piece of my heart sitting there in that classroom.

I held it together until I got home. Then the thoughts started pouring through my head. Will he know where to go to the bathroom? Will he be able to tell the teacher that he needs to go or will he just go? With so many kids, she's pretty busy so if he can't get her attention in time, will he have an accident?

He doesn't know any of the kids! Will he make friends? Will he talk to them and have fun or will any of them realize he doesn't talk as well as they do, and make fun of him?

Will he be able to understand the directions the teacher says, and follow along? Will his autistic traits handicap him in any way, or will being put in this regular Kindergarden (instead of a Special Ed one) push him harder to excel rather than holding him back? Will he get frustrated or overlooked?

I noticed he didn't finish his cereal so what if he gets hungry before lunch?

Sigh...so many more things in my head.

And yet, I know to trust God with my son. After all, Samuel was His before he was mine. And last night we had a special family prayer over Samuel and said a blessing over him. We prayed for his clarity of mind and that he would learn well. We prayed for his protection physically, mentally, and emotionally. He is in God's hands.

Silly mommy. I need to just accept that I won't get much done today except prayer for Samuel!